Do you often look at naturally confident people and wish to be more like them? Do you dream of navigating interactions with a sense of poise and elegance? While there is no quick fix or magic potion for true self-confidence, certain behaviors may be (unknowingly) holding you back.
Our habits and actions affect how we carry ourselves, indicating to others how confident we are.
By saying goodbye to the following 5 behaviors, you’ll appear more self-assured and feel 10 times more worthy and unstoppable!
1. Criticizing Yourself : You might think how you speak to yourself remains private, but it isnt true. Negative self-talk spills over into our conversations.
If we are beating ourselves up internally, there is a high chance we will criticize ourselves out loud without realizing it.
It is not a quick or easy process to stop criticizing yourself, but you can start by using positive affirmations and practicing gratitude.
Gratitude is scientifically proven to improve self-esteem and self confidence as it helps to shift your attention from your short comings to your strengths and achievements.
2. Comparing Yourself To Others: Constantly measuring yourself against others will diminish your self-esteem to the point that everyone around you will know you lack confidence.
People who regularly compare themselves to others are more likely to
- Turn Down Opportunities
- Degrade Themselves
- Self Sabotage
Confident people understand that everyone is on their own unique journey. Even if they are not as good as others in some things, they know that they have their own set of talents.
3. Seeking External Validation : Unconfident people tend to rely on others to validate their own worth while truly self-assured people find it from within.
It is easy to understand if someone relies on external validation as they constantly ask others for their opinions, ideas and thoughts.
Like many other behaviors, seeking external validation stems from low self worth and to stop this self limiting behavior, one must cultivate Self Awareness.
Become aware of when a negative thought arises that leads you to want to seek validation from someone. You will find that the more you trust your judgement, the better you feel about yourself and your abilities.
4. Using closed-off body language: Nonverbal cues play a significant role in how others perceive us. They also serve as a massive giveaway of how we feel about ourselves.
Closed-off body language can convey insecurity and lack of confidence, such as:
- Slouching
- Avoiding eye contact
- Crossing your arms
One good thing about body language is that even if you don’t feel confident, you can ‘fake it till you make it’ by consciously practicing open and assertive body language.
To carry yourself with more confidence and poise, make a habit of:
- Standing tall
- Drawing your shoulders back
- Making eye contact when speaking
- Keeping your arms by your side
- Using expressive gestures
After doing this a few times, you will likely feel more confident and self-assured, as body language doesn’t just trick others but also yourself.This sends signals to the brain that you’re feeling confident. As a result, cortisol levels decrease, and testosterone production is stimulated, the hormone linked with high confidence.
5. Speaking without thinking : Along with body language, our words play a key role in how confident we appear to others. Authentically confident people know this, so they choose their words carefully.
They curate their sentences mentally before they speak them aloud. Why?Thinking before speaking makes your speech clearer and more to the point.
You are less likely to stutter or use filler words, which research has found makes you appear less confident and less credible.
So, thinking before speaking makes you more likely to talk slower and calmer without trying to fill every gap. As a result, you sound more assured and certain of what you are saying.
While some people seem naturally confident, anyone can increase their self-assurance through self-awareness, courage, and perseverance.
Remember that confidence is not about being perfect or never experiencing doubt—it’s about embracing your authentic self and trusting your worth and abilities. So say goodbye to these behaviors and step boldly into the life you deserve!
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